Many of us had childhoods that were kind of childhood and growing up way to hard and fast.
The more we are hurt, shamed, abused, ill-treated, the more we become the opposite to who we were born to be. Within, we either hide or we become harsher versions of ourselves wanting to protect our adult self because the inner-child was hurt and is still frightened of life and people.
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“Apathy” becomes a saviour to many because it means keeping emotionally distant from others and that means not opening up our hearts and souls so that we don’t get hurt any more.
Apathy can mean being heartless while constantly telling ourselves that we are loving and full of heart for others.
Apathy can mean tears, but even through they may satisfy the crier and fool them into thinking that they have love and emotion for others, it is more of a process to gain sympathy and to be seen as sympathetic and capable of being hurt.
People cling to apathy because it protects them from being genuinely hurt and stops them from connecting from all that is important in life.
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Many people never figure out that there is anything wrong with them and they stay that way until death, but some figure it out and realise that they went through some very bad times and came out as a hurting adult, either submissive or harder and demanding etc.
All our causes, religions, political theories, groups etc are results of the dysfunction all around us, and therefore there is much arguing, fighting, disagreements etc, our society today deeply lacks maturity and emotional control.
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If we can all realise that no one today is perfect, no one has it right, because our society worldwide is dysfunctional, then we can understand why we are all having issues and not the gentle souls we were born to be.
Deep within each one of us is a magical gentle honest being that yearns to be set free, to interact with others in the most loving way, but the harder outer shell created by dysfunction all around us while we were growing up has made us hurting souls, struggling to cope and exist, and many wishing (like I did most of my life) that they didn’t exist and wishing that they had never been born.
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One day it occurred to me that if I disliked life so much that there must be something wrong, because there would be nothing more natural that a human being wanting to live once he or she was born.
But if we were hurt deep within spiritually, we become people who are dysfunctional as those around us.
An unnatural world cannot breed beautiful confident courageous souls, it can only breed more dysfunction. This is the problem with the world today.
Just as a Narcissist cannot fix their victim/s, a dysfunctional society cannot fix the dysfunctional people that are a result of the dysfunctional society. All attempts fail, drugs etc are seen as saviours, and the failures heap on top of the failures, and mental illness increases instead of dying away – more proof of the world being currently dysfunctional. But due to the leaders also being results of dysfunction they fail to see the sense in simple logic and common sense.
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Proof:
Many adults of today blame the teenagers for their dysfunctional behaviour, yet the adults refuse to recognise that they brought up the young and the result of any work is the sum of the effort, meaning that the effort was dysfunctional and toxic and the result a new generation of dysfunctional children and teenagers who misbehave (like their own dysfunctional paretns did when they were that age).
The adults don’t recognise their part in the failing of their young because the adults are not mature enough to see their part in the education of their own young, or lack of parental education of their young, they just (like childish children) admire violence as a way to correct their young (spanking) and don’t see themselves as being irresponsible at all. In other words like all childish children, the adults blame everyone else, especially the young.
A sure sign of immaturity is being wrong and blaming others.
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Today we allow the wealthy to destroy the planet in front of our eyes, we allow poisons to be added to our food and water and we do nothing about it, we allow all sorts of dysfunction in society, and because we are afraid to speak up and take action we do nothing.
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The masses easily have the power to change the planet in a week, but the masses are so busy chasing entertainment, demanding their rights, working their tails off, that they just accept what is and let it kill them.
All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
2019.
If you are not making your own choices in life then you might as well kiss any chance of you ever being happy away. Because your life will be receiving what others decide is good for you.You will get the leftovers and they will get the feast.
Every person born is born with the right to a life of their own choices.
If others choose for you then you can guarantee that they will most of the time choose the best for themselves, and you will always get the “bits” that they choose for you. You will get the scraps while others get the main meal.
You deserve more than the scraps. Stand up for yourself.
All we need is a little courage to start a new beginning and we choose for ourselves.
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It is the wise choice.
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All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
7th of May 2015.
Know that the wish to be popular is wanting to be a slave of others opinions, other peoples rules and what makes them happy.
To be popular, and to stay popular, we must do things that the crowd desires and not what we want in our own heart.
Save yourself a lot of heartache and unhappiness by being yourself and doing your own thing. You are you. You are genuine, and you were born an independent person who has all the capabilities to choose as you want. You have free will. Be free by being you.
All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
Saturday, December 7, 2013
Sorry” – What it means to apologize!
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Acknowledgement: Part of the apology needs to start with “I”, For example, “I am sorry!”
Remorse and Empathy – Remorse is truly feeling bad for what you’ve done.
Empathy is about being able to put yourself in the other person’s shoes and know how she or he feels.
Restitution – This means taking action to provide an act or service to make up for the transgression.
– Jeffrey Bernstein Ph.D.
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A sincere apology has three parts: I am sorry. It is my fault. What can I do to make it right?
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Repentance is the activity of reviewing one’s actions and feeling contrition or regret for past wrongs.
Today, it is generally seen as involving a commitment to personal change and the resolve to live a more
responsible and humane life. In other words, being sorry for one’s misdeeds.
But it can also involve sorrow over a specific sin or series of sins that an individual feels he or she has committed.
– Wikipedia.
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Remorse is an emotional expression of personal regret felt by a person after they have committed an act which
they deem to be shameful, hurtful, or violent. Remorse is closely allied to guilt and self-directed resentment.
When a person regrets an earlier action or failure to act, it may be because of remorse or in response to various
other consequences, including being punished for the act or omission.
– Wikipedia.
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Sacrifice is at the heart of repentance. Without deeds, your apology is worthless.— Bryan Davis.
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“Would ‘sorry’ have made any difference? Does it ever? It’s just a word. One word against a thousand actions.”
– Sarah Ockler.
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An apology means little when it is not followed by action to get things right with the person who has been
wronged.
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All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
May 7, 2017 at 11:43 AM.
When I look back at all the disasters that came into my life I can see the paths that led up to that disaster, like for instance a car accident. There are always some form of hints that something is going to go wrong, or instincts, and that gut feeling that something is just not right, yet all around me people are saying its the best thing that ever happened to me.
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Growing up in an Atheist home I was not taught to be mindful of what I thought in my own head, or to trust my instincts, or what would lead to disaster and what choices would lead to happiness and how to judge a situation for its true worth regardless of what others said.
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Please remember that when we decide to follow God and accept God’s guidance it means that we separate ourselves from the way that society thinks. God guides us through people. In fact your whole church could be all for something in your life and God is against it. Your walk with God is your walk alone with God. No one else knows what God wants for you, no one else feels what you feel, sees what you see as you see it, and that is because God is showing it to only you. Trust yourself. Trust God. Don’t count on others views or what you see of the situation, trust God and God alone.
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What did God show you today?
Then take heed!
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All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
May 7, 2017 at 3:56 PM.
On this day in 2019 I watched:
https://www.facebook.com/theshackmovie/