Humans are very good at adjusting to situations as they appear before them. Its for survival. Look at animals in the animal world and you will see that no matter what happened to them and their environment they adjust to it and then get on in that environment as best as they can.
We humans do this as well and this can be to great advantage to us individually or as a group.
A thing to be weary about though, is settling down in a situation that is not good for you. Life, people, can put us in situations that seem to us unavoidable and inescapable.
But the reality is that the situation is just one of many, but our view of life ourself, our limitations, of other people’s control over our lives, and so on can make us think that what we have experienced is the only path, the only way to live now, and we must accept it as it is.
As a child I experienced many abuses with the result of my becoming very unconfident and afraid of challenge, life, people and especially afraid of trying.
With this outlook of life when I ended up in a situation I just settled in and accepted it.
In this state of mind when others around me, like family, got in to bad situations I was kind of carried along with them and being loyal I suffered alongside of them.
Looking back now in retrospect I can see that I could have stepped off those paths, missed all that suffering and even gained some self confidence and courage, but I was too afraid to try.
The thing about being caught up in bad situations due to our loyalties and connections with other people is that one of the main reasons that we stay in situations that we should not be in and we can even see that they are going to turn out bad for us, is that we are not mentally prepared to face challenges and step away and actually take the steps to save our own self.
Some people think that Loyalty means suffering with family, spouse, or friends “just because’, and then when they go down we proudly and very foolishly go down with them, when we didn’t really need to at all.
There must be logic and Common Sense with Loyalty.
When we realise that we are loyal, but this loyal commitment is going to hurt us because the people/person who we are loyal to is a fool and has a very dim future ahead of them, we should be able to use common sense and logic and depart from situations that are going to turn out bad for us.
The point is that we should Recognize what is really going on, and where it is all leading, and regardless of our loyalty we need to take heed of this and warn-ourself that this is not going to turn out well for ourself and those with us (direct family such as close friends and children).
Any bad situation that we are being pushed in to is very likely a person wanting us to go down with them, and for you this should not be a consideration or an option.
Many times in our lives we find ourselves in situation that we landed-in. Those people with Vision, Imagination, Faith in themselves and for many faith in God, will take up the challenge gladly and get out of harmful situations that they can see are bad for their personal future and they will distance themselves from the people who are trying to drag them down with them.
Those who are Mentally-Blind and Loyal will allow themselves to be dragged down and their future destroyed along with their children’s future’s being harmed.
Having confidence now and not when I was younger, I can see all the times that I should have done something about my life, all the people I should have walked away from, and all the bad experiences and bad people I should have avoided, but I was always too scared to take my life in my own hands and change my path and direction to a far better direction.
It is up to each individual whether he or she wants to Adjust to a Situation and stay in it and let that situation for our own future or make the necessary changes, take on the necessary challenges, and do the needed things to make their future change for the better.
And yes, this does mean leaving people behind, and it does mean some will see us as selfish, and not loyal, but that’s all right, because all those that adjust and settle in situations that they fall in to are those who will fall in to the future situations that are bad for them and just let it all happen, claiming to be loyal and not saving themselves.
They will reap the rewards of failure and disappointments.
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