You and I know that the feeling of letting people down is not a nice feeling, and people may use that against us.
Please believe me when I say that you need to forgive yourself and let go of that guilt as soon as you have learned the lesson, noted how not to make that mistake again, and then do better in the future. People need to understand that things go wrong, and not to hold people accountable for past mistakes and wrongs because they are now gone and over with. Mature trustworthy people move on happily.

If they can make excuses for their own behaviour, then they can do exactly the same for you.

 

If they forgive themselves, then they can forgive us too.

 

If they make mistakes and then quickly move on, then they can accept that we made a mistake and quickly move on.

 

It is your human right to demand to be respected and treated fairly, all the time. Please don’t make excuses for family and old friends and allow them to walk over you. They don’t have that right to do that, no one has the right to treat you like that.

When they make mistakes your day is changed if you are involved, and you have to accept that, they expect that of you, and they expect you to follow the new changes from their mistake gracefully and happily. So when you make a mistake, expect and demand the same good treatment back from them, if they don’t treat you the same they probably have some narcissistic tendances, so be very wary, watch them carefully in the future.

People who don’t treat us fairly have issues with themselves and life, and their negativeness and pushiness is not a reflection of who you are, it is a reflection of how uncooperative they are, and how limited they are. Also how unforgiving and un-encouraging they really are when things don’t go their own way.

 

You need to live your life as your beliefs show you to live.

 

You see, when things change in our life we are supposed to adapt to it. If people get upset and don’t like what we have done or they don’t like our new views (having a new Belief-System etc) then that is something that reflexes how non-flexible and un-encouraging that person is.

 

When it comes to dealing with family and friends, you may think, “Well, they can’t all be wrong!”, the news I have for you is that if you are being treated in any unfair manner, pushed around and not allowed to be who it is that your heart and soul wants you to be then “they are all wrong!”, they all have the same blind mind-set that deludes them to the truth of your life and your worth.

We are not perfect, we make mistakes, they need to accept that and they need to learn to trust “your instincts” as well as their own, if they don’t then depart such limiting company. Some people want their own destiny, but they don’t want us to have our destiny.

They need to respect your feelings, and they need to let you air out your views without interruption, you deserve your right to say what you believe just as they have that right.

They need to listen to you, and then allow you to have your dreams.

 

When it comes to your life and your own destiny then let them know what you believe and what it is that you are going to do. Be brave. You also must act on your beliefs regardless of what they say, you must do your own thing. To do otherwise means that you are an emotional prisoner to someone, or a to your own family and friends views, but “their views are not you”. Be wise and let them go if that is the case, freedom is in being free to do as you choose to be.

Your Belief-System and your heart is the driver of your soul, and you need to drive your own life without limiting instructions and bully behaviours from others. Stop arguing with them and do what you need to do. take risks, face fears, reach out, because out there in the world is your destiny, your life, your happiness.

 

There is no need for you to emotionally kill yourself over and over again from guilt, it is done, it is the past, lesson learned, now move on. If others won’t let you forget the past then let them go, show them the door and lead them outside and happily wave goodbye.

If you are among unforgiving people who always let you feel that you are not good enough, then do yourself a great favour and walk out that door and never go back. They don’t deserve you. You are just as good as they are, and you deserve what they have, and because you are a nice person you deserve more. Know that you have exact rights to the right that they demand. Don’t ever accept less.

 

All the best from

James M Sandbrook.
25th of June, 2015.