In the past I had a coping mechanism called cowarding-out. I would rather take the “cowardly no show path” than the path of achievement, or of trying.
Having very low confidence, very low self esteem, I figured that if I tried things that they would all turn out bad because I was a loser.
So instead of trying, I just waited and waited for the opportunity to go by, and then I would comfort my unhappy soul with words like, “its gone by now so there is nothing I can do about it” as a pathetic excuse for not trying.
And if the same sort of thing appeared in the future I would do the same, I would turn my insecure back on it and coward-out and do nothing.
I don’t do this anymore. I have learned to try harder, to make more effort, to go the extra mile and to do worthy things, and to do risky things because they are what bring forth positive changes in life.
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Part of the change of character I made was from discovering that we are all capable of wonderful things, and that my old attitude (my past soul) was a creation of the toxic environment I grew up in and having dysfunctional parents.
In other words they created the shy, nervous, anxious child who grew into an adult with the same fear of life, and now as an adult I had to change my character, become new, and become the soul/person who I always wanted to be.
Understanding what happened in the past, not being too hard on myself and having a new strong desire to die a better more worthy soul inspired me to keep trying and to go for things that I wanted rather than let them pass by.
We can all do this. Life will not get better for us until we become better ourselves. For ourselves we need to seek what we want, try again and again, take risks, because in doing so we create a much better future for ourselves and we feel so much better about ourselves for having a go.
🕊️
All the best from
James M Sandbrook.
Friday, 31 May 2019, 9:39:13 AM.